Thursday, October 6, 2011

And So It Begins...

I promised God that I would give Him glory for everything He's done in me and through me since my husband's death. Friends, apart from Him...I'd be a mess. And, if I'm being completely transparent (why stop now...right?)'s possible I may not even still be here without God's abundant mercy and grace. Now, don't get me wrong...I've never had suicidal thoughts or anything of the sort since my own husband's suicide 5 months ago. But, honestly...I can't say that apart from Christ I would have the same assurance. I shutter to think...

This journey has been excruciatingly painful. There have been days I didn't want to crawl out of bed. There were many nights in those early days that I slept on the couch...I just couldn't go back to "our bed" without my Chris beside me. I cried and cried and cried until there was nothing left in me. And then...the gutteral cries would begin again.

But, all throughout the pain and the torment of grief...I kept praying...

This is YOUR story to tell, Lord. This isn't about me at all. This is about You, precious Lord. It's all about what You've done through me, what You're doing through me, and what You will do through me.'s all for Your glory!

I agreed to walk through any door that God would open where He wants His story told...whether it be just tiny snippets or the full-blown ordeal. I'll do whatever He asks me to do and go wherever He wants me to go.

And so it begins...

Within one week, I've shared snippets of His Story on two different radio programs. One will be broadcast later this month via Encouragement Cafe Radio, so I'll let you know more at a later date. The other? Yesterday morning during the first day of our annual Sharathon at the radio station where I work 106.9 the Light (WMIT). Here's the audio if you'd like to take a listen. My voice is shaky (I was fighting back the tears big time), but I think you'll get the jist. It's short...I promise!

To Him be all the glory!


  1. I love you, Leah! Continuing to lift you up in prayer. Can't wait to meet you in a few weeks! I also love Laura Story.

  2. Leah, thank you for sharing this. Love you! :~)

  3. One step at a time---following the Good Shepherd wherever He leads---and He's leading you through this. PTL! I know other widows who's husbands died by suicide---and with God you're not alone. hugs to you

  4. Good for you Leah, allowing God to use you to minister to others while your grief continues! So Proud to call you Friend!!

    Cindy @ Consider It All Joy