Thursday, January 13, 2011

I Gave Up!

Astronauts in space could have heard me as I screamed in the shower this morning, "I give up!" (Except for the small fact that my voice is practically gone.) Enough is enough. Last night was the straw that broke the camel's back. I've been suffering with what medical professionals deem "the crud" for 10 days now! Heavy congestion, coughing that won't quit, chills, headache, and a side that hurts from all the coughing. Now...before I go any further, let me just say I'm not typically "wimpy" when I'm sick. I'm a pretty tough cookie with a high pain tolerance and will generally self-medicate and self-diagnose. I've found quite the OTC remedy that will cure just about any upper respiratory ailment and pride myself in the fact that I'm not often knocked down for long (see the "pride" word...yep, it goeth before a fall).

So, when I woke this morning (after having been awake most of the night), and I actually felt worse...well, let's just say this girl wasn't gone take it anymore! I didn't care if several of our roads still had ice on them, and it was 18 degrees outside this morning. I didn't care if my car was covered in a new layer of snow that fell last night and required a bit of "attention" before heading out. I didn't care if my gas tank was near empty...I was going to the walk-in clinic at my doctor's office and nobody was going to stop me! As I was making all of these great plans from under the warmth of the my hot shower, I heard a gentle whisper in my spirit...

"Are you done yet?"

Oh no. Not again.

"Daughter, are you done trying to control everything?"

Yep - here we go again. That control word. I knew a lesson was coming out of this one. I could almost see God smiling as soon as I figured it out. Once again, I tried to take matters into my own hands for a little bit too long. I tried to control everything to the point of making myself miserable and rendered virtually ineffective. God could have taken care of this long before now if I'd just taken my own hands off of it. This morning, God used the professionals in my doctor's office to help with the healing process. And...they so gently reminded me that I was actually a pretty sick kiddo.

So, once again...I gave up! And...once again...God smiled!

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